This is a blog all about my adventures in Breastfeeding Peer Support. I want to share all the things I have learned and celebrate amazing breastfeeding Mothers and their babies.

I would like to share other peoples stories here too. Accounts of problems overcome, funny things your older children have said, strange places you have attached your baby and so on. Please email me with any stories you'd like to share with other breastfeeding Mothers. Please include what you'd like to be called (URLs ok or just a name), how old your baby was at the time and where abouts you are geographically.

Friday, 9 July 2010

Is Breastfeeding Creepy?

I have had to think long and hard about writing this piece, many people have emailed me asking for a view or opinion on the Kathryn Blundell article in Mother and Baby magazine a few weeks ago. I have not read the actual article but there are excerpts and evaluations in the Guardian, in the Telegraph and in the Mail.

I find this makes me quite angry, not least because of the belief that 'it didn't do me any harm' that annoys the shit out of me, I think people with this thinking fall into the same camp as 'I smoked 40 a day, didn't do me any harm' and 'he'll only eat chicken nuggets, I can't make him eat vegetables' All these beliefs are so bad for our long term health both personally and as a society and cost the NHS a fortune!!

But the assumption is that when you become a Mother you stop being a sexual being. And yes we probably make love to our partners far less than we did pre children because of time and space constraints but that doesn't mean we don't do it at all. Why can't Mothers be sexy?

I work with a peer supporter who is of the belief that her breasts are only there for her children, I accept her thinking but maybe don't fully understand. She is of the belief that no man (or woamn) has any claim to her body and that it belongs only to her children.

Yes, my breasts nourish my children both physically and spiritually but they are still a huge part of my sexual being. I have spent most of the last nine years breastfeeding my children but that doesn't mean they are not also a part of my sexual life. Or that they are only there for the child I am currently breastfeeding. I provide nutrition for Sebastian but I also provide comfort and warmth through my breasts to my other children. It's a comfy place to rest a fevered brow, a good place to rest upon when tired or hurt or sad. They really are the bosom of our family!

The 'creepy' thing reminds me of a woman I knew at playgroup who always thought I was a bit odd for breatsfeeding my girls beyond the first weeks of their lives but she was really shocked that I also breastfed Nathaniel and asked me was 'it not wierd because he was a boy?' I was so confused by this comment but she really only saw her breasts as a sexual part of her and the thought of someone with a penis sucking upon them made her squirm. Erm, no, it's not wierd, he was my child that I'd grown in my body and continued to grow through my body, it really made no difference what was in his nappy!

So to sum up and stop waffling I think that breasts can be used for the nourishment of a baby or child but still be of pleasure to both Mother and Father and that they really can be multifunctional and shoudln't be pigeon holed into one use only!

There, I said it I like my breasts in more ways than one, does that make me creepy?
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2 comments:

  1. .Homemakers Tales10 July 2010 at 04:28

    I,m 100% with you ....I breast fed mine babies for 14 months and enjoyed it!! during that time we had a lots laughs about my very ample multifunctional bosom ,my husband never felt left out at all he just had to share .me , i would have been so sad had i not been able to breast feed ,
    During my years working on the Maternity post natal unit in Plymouth I supported many Mums and also when i was feeding my own

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  2. My life with MND12 July 2010 at 16:56

    Have you seen the Facebook group...something along the lines of 'Mother and Baby magazine need to support breastfeeding'?!

    I find the comments totally awful that she wrote that breastfeeding was 'creepy'. She could have used perhaps a better word to describe her feelings.....don'e you think?

    It was designed (I think) to be an article about those people who did not wish to breastfeed, and that's fair enough - we cannot push our (pro-breastfeeding) opinions onto everyone and I would never dream of doing so...but for the DEPUTY EDITOR to write this...and in the manner that she did, is a bit bad.

    Also, I understand that she wrote lots of false statements in it, either about breastmilk not being as 'good' as it was made out to be, or about formula being 'better' than its made out to be...I forget which way it was...but there's been all sorts of complaints about that too.

    On another note, my hubby can't wait to get 'his boobs back' (his words, not mine!) but he'll have to wait until I'm ready to stop feeding Miss Bronte! lol xx

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